A Poem dedicated to my Aunty in the hospital:
If I Could (by the Rambling Pilot's Wife)
If I could take away your pain
And lay there in your place,
I would do it in a heart beat
Not a second I would waste.
If I could, I'd give you some relief
And take it all away...
Every break, cut, and bruise from you...
Even for a moment, an hour, or a day.
If I could give you a thousand kisses
For everything you've said and done (for me and everyone)
It would be too many to give in a lifetime...
In a billion setting suns!
Instead I'll call on God's angels
For my place to take
So you can consider yourself kissed,
As you sleep and when you wake.
Then I will know for certain,
Though I cannot take your place,
That you have angel's wings around you
As they breathe upon your face.
Monday, April 13, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Life in general just got a little worse....
After struggling about what to write on last post I just found out last night that my dear Aunt got in a horrible car accident. She is diabetic and went into a diabetic coma while driving down a major road, probably driving 50 mph or so. She hit 4 other vehicles, but only one other person was brought to the hospital and they were released that night. Her car flipped over at least 4 times, all the windows were gone, three doors were blown off... its amazing she is still alive! She lost part of one of her thumbs and has fractures all over her body and face. Luckily there wasn't any major internal bleeding to be concerned about, she is able to wiggle her fingers and toes and is coherent enough to answer yes and no questions with hand signals. Her head is in a halo-brace and they have her torso all braced as well to keep her from moving her spine. She will be going into surgery to have a metal disc put into her neck and they are still trying to get her completely stabilized.
She is the most special person in our family. She is our rock, the person who seems to take care of everyone else and we all rely on. At least now we all will have an opportunity to step up to the plate and help her out and take over some of her responsibilities. I think it will take a while for her injuries to heal, but no one really knows how long she will be in the hospital or how many surgeries she will need to be fully repaired. I guess my life was a bit to boring and God had to throw me a curve ball, huh? I just pray that she isn't in pain and that her recovery is quick and that the rest of the family will be there for her as much as or more than she has been there for us. She doesn't deserve to be in this situation. She is such a wonderful person!
She is the most special person in our family. She is our rock, the person who seems to take care of everyone else and we all rely on. At least now we all will have an opportunity to step up to the plate and help her out and take over some of her responsibilities. I think it will take a while for her injuries to heal, but no one really knows how long she will be in the hospital or how many surgeries she will need to be fully repaired. I guess my life was a bit to boring and God had to throw me a curve ball, huh? I just pray that she isn't in pain and that her recovery is quick and that the rest of the family will be there for her as much as or more than she has been there for us. She doesn't deserve to be in this situation. She is such a wonderful person!
Monday, March 30, 2009
Life in general
Life is going pretty well. The husband is home, so that is good. For some reason when he was gone this last time it seemed like a loooooong time, and now that he is home the time is passing way to quickly (why does that happen?). My little baby girl is becoming less of a baby every day, she is now 17 months old. She still does mostly baby babbling, but her favorite phrase is "uh-oh etti-o" for uh-oh spaghetti-o. Its super cute. She does answer all questions with "no" and that is funny and sometimes annoying to hear "no" all the time. But its the way kids are, so I can't complain. The temper tantrums are sometimes exhausting. But that also seems to happen around the same time every day, one hour before her nap and two hours before her bedtime, pre-dinner time. Kids get cranky, just how it is. I have tried time-outs with her, and that is just a load of fun (sarcastic tone). I put her in her crib for one minute, and sometimes it actually does calm her down... amazingly enough. I just hate the crying and all the drama, gives me a headache sometimes. But I love my baby girl, so in the end all is forgiven.
I am currently trying to lose more weight. I still have that soft squishy belly fat from my pregnancy weight gain. I think the rest of my body has responded pretty well to the regular exercise I started about six months ago. I just wish there was a magic wand I could wave to make that problem area go away. So I decided to get serious with my work outs and really start doing some major sweating and burn those calories! I am going to try a workout video called "30 Day Shred" by Jillian, from the Biggest Loser. Hopefully that will get some results... I will keep you posted. Since I am planning on trying to get pregnant in a couple months I am ready to get to a good weight so I don't have to lose this fat plus the pregnancy weight from the next one. I don't believe on building one pregnancy's fat on top of another's fat and then just losing it all together at the same time... that's the kind of silly nonsense like saying, "Why make the bed when you are just going to mess it up again tomorrow?" I like a my sheets clean, crisp and tightly tucked in or I can't sleep as well at night. So same goes for my body, tightly tucked and I am a happy camper. Hee Hee. Of course its been a long time since I have been nice and lean, and firmed up. But that's no reason to stop trying. So wish me luck... on losing the weight and getting pregnant too. I hope to have both accomplished by the end of this summer... :-)
On the baby subject, that family member I talked about the last couple posts is in the process of waiting to see if she is pregnant from a second try with an IUI procedure. I really hope it worked for her this time. I have a good feeling about it this time, but that's all it is... a feeling. As I said before, I really hope she gets pregnant first. I would feel bad if I had my second child and she was still trying for her first. I know I can't control things like that, but I am praying that it doesn't happen. So cross your fingers and wish her luck as well, or pray, or wish on a shooting star when you see one next. I would be so ecstatic to see her pregnant!!! And of course she would be too, as well as her husband.
Well, that's my life in general... talk to you later!
I am currently trying to lose more weight. I still have that soft squishy belly fat from my pregnancy weight gain. I think the rest of my body has responded pretty well to the regular exercise I started about six months ago. I just wish there was a magic wand I could wave to make that problem area go away. So I decided to get serious with my work outs and really start doing some major sweating and burn those calories! I am going to try a workout video called "30 Day Shred" by Jillian, from the Biggest Loser. Hopefully that will get some results... I will keep you posted. Since I am planning on trying to get pregnant in a couple months I am ready to get to a good weight so I don't have to lose this fat plus the pregnancy weight from the next one. I don't believe on building one pregnancy's fat on top of another's fat and then just losing it all together at the same time... that's the kind of silly nonsense like saying, "Why make the bed when you are just going to mess it up again tomorrow?" I like a my sheets clean, crisp and tightly tucked in or I can't sleep as well at night. So same goes for my body, tightly tucked and I am a happy camper. Hee Hee. Of course its been a long time since I have been nice and lean, and firmed up. But that's no reason to stop trying. So wish me luck... on losing the weight and getting pregnant too. I hope to have both accomplished by the end of this summer... :-)
On the baby subject, that family member I talked about the last couple posts is in the process of waiting to see if she is pregnant from a second try with an IUI procedure. I really hope it worked for her this time. I have a good feeling about it this time, but that's all it is... a feeling. As I said before, I really hope she gets pregnant first. I would feel bad if I had my second child and she was still trying for her first. I know I can't control things like that, but I am praying that it doesn't happen. So cross your fingers and wish her luck as well, or pray, or wish on a shooting star when you see one next. I would be so ecstatic to see her pregnant!!! And of course she would be too, as well as her husband.
Well, that's my life in general... talk to you later!
Monday, March 9, 2009
The Countdown
At some point, after my husband's been gone for a few weeks, we both start doing a countdown of days left. He'll send me an instant message on my Blackberry, "9 days!" and I will send a smiley face back. I am glad he wants to come back home so bad that he is counting the days, and then I start to get excited and start the countdown myself. I don't like to think about how long he has been gone, but its fun to start seeing the numbers get smaller and smaller as he sends me messages towards the end.
Its been a rough month while he was gone this time. I was sick, the baby got Bronchitis, my in-laws were both sick, and I almost about lost my mind after two weeks held up in the house with cold weather outside and not allowing any friends to come over in fear of them getting sick. Now that we are all feeling better hubby's home coming is only a week away! YAYYYYYY!!!! I am going to be soooo happy to see him again. I am glad we will be healthy when he gets home, but I really hope the next time both I, the in-laws, and the baby are sick he will be around to help out. She never loses her energy when she is sick, but I am just a pile of jell-o when I'm sick... laying on the floor while she plays around me or on me. Its not fun. If the in-laws aren't sick they can take her away when she is up and let me take a nap to recover. But when they are also sick then its all up to me to take care of the munchkin, whether I have the energy or not.
These past few days I have been taking her all over the place out of the house, and now when we are home alone I crave going outside... like a junky looking for my next fix. I try to think of ANYTHING to get out of the house, an errand or a friend to visit, or I try to tag along with someone else while they go about their business. Strange how sometimes all I want to do is stay home and the very idea of taking the baby out somewhere seems like such a feat of strength, and other times its like no biggie, I can go anywhere and do anything with her! I guess its because I was at home alone for so long that any trip outside our home feels GREAT! Anyway... this blog is good for those times I am anxious about sitting around at home, I have something to do, other blogs to visit and I can just chill.
Here's to the pilot husband's return... "cheers!" and the wonderful countdown every morning brings... 10, 9, 8, 7, 6... woo hoo!
Its been a rough month while he was gone this time. I was sick, the baby got Bronchitis, my in-laws were both sick, and I almost about lost my mind after two weeks held up in the house with cold weather outside and not allowing any friends to come over in fear of them getting sick. Now that we are all feeling better hubby's home coming is only a week away! YAYYYYYY!!!! I am going to be soooo happy to see him again. I am glad we will be healthy when he gets home, but I really hope the next time both I, the in-laws, and the baby are sick he will be around to help out. She never loses her energy when she is sick, but I am just a pile of jell-o when I'm sick... laying on the floor while she plays around me or on me. Its not fun. If the in-laws aren't sick they can take her away when she is up and let me take a nap to recover. But when they are also sick then its all up to me to take care of the munchkin, whether I have the energy or not.
These past few days I have been taking her all over the place out of the house, and now when we are home alone I crave going outside... like a junky looking for my next fix. I try to think of ANYTHING to get out of the house, an errand or a friend to visit, or I try to tag along with someone else while they go about their business. Strange how sometimes all I want to do is stay home and the very idea of taking the baby out somewhere seems like such a feat of strength, and other times its like no biggie, I can go anywhere and do anything with her! I guess its because I was at home alone for so long that any trip outside our home feels GREAT! Anyway... this blog is good for those times I am anxious about sitting around at home, I have something to do, other blogs to visit and I can just chill.
Here's to the pilot husband's return... "cheers!" and the wonderful countdown every morning brings... 10, 9, 8, 7, 6... woo hoo!
Monday, February 23, 2009
Phew!!!
As I had mentioned in an earlier post, I am planning on getting pregnant again sometime this year... but not NOW. I have been waiting for my period to come along for a few days now, its been pretty regular for the past 5 months, and I started to wonder... "when did my husband and I last have sex? Did he wear a condom? Was I possibly OVULATING???!!! Oh no!" So instead of wait another worried, sleepless night about the possibility I took a pregnancy test, it was negative... "Phew!!!"
Its not that being pregnant would be horrible timing right now, just not that ideal. #1 Reason is because the family member I mentioned earlier, that has been trying to get pregnant for a few years now, has just gone to the next step of getting an IUI (inter-uterine insemination). And now she is waiting to see if it took. I would really like for this to work for her and not steal her thunder if she was to announce that she is pregnant finally. I don't want to be like, "Yeah, me too. For a few weeks now." And then have my baby before her baby and all that jazz. That would royally suck. I am planning on actually TRYING to get pregnant in a few months. If she isn't pregnant at that point I'm not going to stress about it, I really don't want to wait any longer than that for my second baby. #2 Reason its bad timing is that I am trying to lose weight, and I just started making some more headway the past couple weeks... actually I am about where I was when I last got pregnant. I want to lose around 10-15 more before I get pregnant, that would be lovely. I want to at least have the chance to try to lose those extra pounds before we start actually trying again. If I don't lose 10 lbs by then I won't care as much and just start to try for that baby. #3 Reason is the baby's due date would have been Halloween, according to when I thought I might have been knocked up. And my first child was born 10 days before Halloween, leading to reason #4, their birthdays would be too close. I really would like to give my kids the chance to celebrate their birthdays without the shadow of another siblings birthday looming over them, or a major holiday getting in the way... if I can help it, that would be ideal. There are some other minor reasons to not want to be pregnant right now, but those are the major ones.
Now its just waiting for this sneaky, late, stressin' me out period to start. If it doesn't... then I guess I will be trying another pregnancy test, there are two in a box... conveniently enough. I guess I should be more careful until I am REALLY ready. That'll teach me to be careless. And for now I can at least get a good nights sleep. (I suppose I know better now what that family member has been going through with the waiting, and the unknown, and the stressing... and she's had to do this for YEARS now, poor thing. I bet she hasn't had a good nights sleep in a looooonng time.)
Its not that being pregnant would be horrible timing right now, just not that ideal. #1 Reason is because the family member I mentioned earlier, that has been trying to get pregnant for a few years now, has just gone to the next step of getting an IUI (inter-uterine insemination). And now she is waiting to see if it took. I would really like for this to work for her and not steal her thunder if she was to announce that she is pregnant finally. I don't want to be like, "Yeah, me too. For a few weeks now." And then have my baby before her baby and all that jazz. That would royally suck. I am planning on actually TRYING to get pregnant in a few months. If she isn't pregnant at that point I'm not going to stress about it, I really don't want to wait any longer than that for my second baby. #2 Reason its bad timing is that I am trying to lose weight, and I just started making some more headway the past couple weeks... actually I am about where I was when I last got pregnant. I want to lose around 10-15 more before I get pregnant, that would be lovely. I want to at least have the chance to try to lose those extra pounds before we start actually trying again. If I don't lose 10 lbs by then I won't care as much and just start to try for that baby. #3 Reason is the baby's due date would have been Halloween, according to when I thought I might have been knocked up. And my first child was born 10 days before Halloween, leading to reason #4, their birthdays would be too close. I really would like to give my kids the chance to celebrate their birthdays without the shadow of another siblings birthday looming over them, or a major holiday getting in the way... if I can help it, that would be ideal. There are some other minor reasons to not want to be pregnant right now, but those are the major ones.
Now its just waiting for this sneaky, late, stressin' me out period to start. If it doesn't... then I guess I will be trying another pregnancy test, there are two in a box... conveniently enough. I guess I should be more careful until I am REALLY ready. That'll teach me to be careless. And for now I can at least get a good nights sleep. (I suppose I know better now what that family member has been going through with the waiting, and the unknown, and the stressing... and she's had to do this for YEARS now, poor thing. I bet she hasn't had a good nights sleep in a looooonng time.)
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Why is it...?
Why does it seem that every time my husband leaves for a month my baby girl gets sick? And most of the time I am sick also, so I am stuck trying to get rest whenever possible and not having any energy to keep up with her during the day? (Because despite being sick she never seems to skip a beat. She always has the energy to run around and play.)
Isn't that just always the way it goes? At least this time my cold ended after a few days. But she ended up having Bronchitis! I had to give her a treatment at the Dr.'s office with a breathing vapor machine, it helped her stop wheezing. She cried her eyes out, and it was me... the great and powerful Mom, who had to hold her while she was miserable and didn't understand why I was forcing her to sit on my lap with this plastic mask over her face to breath this smokey vapor stuff. At one moment she even looked up at me with these doe eyes, these hurt little eyes that were asking, "Why Mommy? Why are you doing this to me?" Poor little thing.
Its moment like those that I wish I had my husband there to comfort me through the whole ordeal. But somehow, as a Mother, I was able to hold her calmly and tune out the loud cries of misery and have the peace of mind that I was doing what was best for her. That God given, innate, Mommy strength stuff is really something, isn't it? Thank goodness. Hard to imagine, before I was a Mom, that one day I would do things such as catch my child's vomit in my hands unflinchingly and tell her in a calm voice, "that's fine sweetheart, you are going to be okay," then rush her to the bath tub to get all cleaned up. When before the very idea of someone throwing up would make me want to vomit myself! And believe you me, my husband would just yell "GROSS!" and hand her to me as he cursed his way to the bathroom to clean himself off. Here's to Moms everywhere... we ARE super-women!
Isn't that just always the way it goes? At least this time my cold ended after a few days. But she ended up having Bronchitis! I had to give her a treatment at the Dr.'s office with a breathing vapor machine, it helped her stop wheezing. She cried her eyes out, and it was me... the great and powerful Mom, who had to hold her while she was miserable and didn't understand why I was forcing her to sit on my lap with this plastic mask over her face to breath this smokey vapor stuff. At one moment she even looked up at me with these doe eyes, these hurt little eyes that were asking, "Why Mommy? Why are you doing this to me?" Poor little thing.
Its moment like those that I wish I had my husband there to comfort me through the whole ordeal. But somehow, as a Mother, I was able to hold her calmly and tune out the loud cries of misery and have the peace of mind that I was doing what was best for her. That God given, innate, Mommy strength stuff is really something, isn't it? Thank goodness. Hard to imagine, before I was a Mom, that one day I would do things such as catch my child's vomit in my hands unflinchingly and tell her in a calm voice, "that's fine sweetheart, you are going to be okay," then rush her to the bath tub to get all cleaned up. When before the very idea of someone throwing up would make me want to vomit myself! And believe you me, my husband would just yell "GROSS!" and hand her to me as he cursed his way to the bathroom to clean himself off. Here's to Moms everywhere... we ARE super-women!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
It's 2009!
I don't have much to say, but I feel like I should be writing now that its the middle of January. So... happy 2009! I hope everyone has a fantastic year.
Things I am looking forward to this year, getting pregnant. Things I am not looking forward to this year... getting pregnant. While I am ready for baby #2 in many ways I also am a little fearful about how having a second child is going to effect my life. And even though I have already been pregnant before and had a wonderful baby girl I sometimes wonder if the second time around I could actually be as fortunate as the first. Will the second pregnancy go as well? Will child #2 be as happy and easy as my first? Will I be able to handle nursing a baby and potty training a toddler at the same time? What will it be like when my husband is gone for a month at a time and I have a newborn and a toddler to look after? Will I still be able to help my Mom when she needs me and as well? (That's a whole other story for another day.) So many unknowns and yet its such a wonderful thought that I we will be trying for another baby very soon. Its almost time to start that folic acid again... already??? I can't believe it. I could wait longer, but I don't want a five year span between kids. At this point baby #1 will be around 2 1/2 or 3 years old when #2 arrives. Hard to believe.
I also have a family member who has been trying to get pregnant since before I got pregnant with my first, and I am going to feel horrible if she doesn't get pregnant before I do with my second. But at the same time I can't put my life on hold to make sure she is next... and she doesn't expect me to do that anyways. I just hope and pray that any day now I will get a call with the good news... and I hope she has twins :-) That would be super!!! Maybe a bit difficult to hanlde, but then she would be "caught up"... silly thoughts, I know. I just want her to be happy and to have the family she has always dreamed of. And twins are an actual possibility for her, it runs in her side of the family. So I think it would be a double blessing if that happened and a time to celebrate!!! Plus, we would all be there to help her out.
Things I am looking forward to this year, getting pregnant. Things I am not looking forward to this year... getting pregnant. While I am ready for baby #2 in many ways I also am a little fearful about how having a second child is going to effect my life. And even though I have already been pregnant before and had a wonderful baby girl I sometimes wonder if the second time around I could actually be as fortunate as the first. Will the second pregnancy go as well? Will child #2 be as happy and easy as my first? Will I be able to handle nursing a baby and potty training a toddler at the same time? What will it be like when my husband is gone for a month at a time and I have a newborn and a toddler to look after? Will I still be able to help my Mom when she needs me and as well? (That's a whole other story for another day.) So many unknowns and yet its such a wonderful thought that I we will be trying for another baby very soon. Its almost time to start that folic acid again... already??? I can't believe it. I could wait longer, but I don't want a five year span between kids. At this point baby #1 will be around 2 1/2 or 3 years old when #2 arrives. Hard to believe.
I also have a family member who has been trying to get pregnant since before I got pregnant with my first, and I am going to feel horrible if she doesn't get pregnant before I do with my second. But at the same time I can't put my life on hold to make sure she is next... and she doesn't expect me to do that anyways. I just hope and pray that any day now I will get a call with the good news... and I hope she has twins :-) That would be super!!! Maybe a bit difficult to hanlde, but then she would be "caught up"... silly thoughts, I know. I just want her to be happy and to have the family she has always dreamed of. And twins are an actual possibility for her, it runs in her side of the family. So I think it would be a double blessing if that happened and a time to celebrate!!! Plus, we would all be there to help her out.
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