Thursday, November 26, 2009

Excited Insomnia

I have been sleeping better lately, I have been taking melatonin at 11pm and then shutting down the computer and TV at 11:30pm and drifting off to sleep by 12am. I then wake up naturally (no alarm clock) at 7am. If I stick to that routine I usually do fine. But lately I've been too excited to fall asleep! So I am calling this "excited insomnia," since its not the usual unable to sleep for no reason type of insomnia that I usually get.

What am I excited about? Two things... The first is that I am 149.5 lbs and if I lose 1.5 pounds this week I will be 148 lbs. The scale has hit 148 lbs already, but I am talking about my Monday weigh ins. That is one of my highest weight days during the week. Thursday and Friday tend to show the lowest numbers, and I get pretty excited over those. But every Monday the scale has been around 150 lbs or higher. This past Monday it was under 150, so that made me pretty hopeful that I am finally under that mark for good. And what excites me most is that if I do actually weigh in at 148 lbs next week then its conceivably only 3 more weeks until I am at my goal weight of 145 lbs!

While that is pretty exciting enough I am also excited that today (now that its 12:26am) I may have my LH surge, which means that in the next 24 to 48 hours I will be ovulating. I am really excited about this try in particular because of the way my cycles are and I am due for a regular length cycle this month. I am thinking that may help my chances of getting pregnant.

With those two things on my mind its hard to focus on the weight loss goal. I want to work out hard enough to lose at least a pound per week, but once I am ovulating I don't want to work too hard and harm any chances of little swimmers reaching their destination or a fertilized egg's chances of hanging onto the uterine wall. And while I know that exercising isn't suppose to effect either of those things happening, I still want to tread lightly the next two weeks to not hurt my chances of getting pregnant either. If I am pregnant and weigh 148 I should be happy, since my initial pre-pregnancy weight goal was 154 lbs. If I am not pregnant I am sure I can reach 145 pounds by the beginning of the new year. So I shouldn't feel guilty about taking things easy on the bouncing around during exercise the next two weeks and giving myself the best shot possible this time around. I don't have that many opportunities with JD being gone half the year. And these long cycle months come around for me every 6 months, so this is even a rarer event, that he is home and I have a long cycle (regular length cycle, actually). So, logically I should focus on the getting pregnant goal in my life and put the weight loss goal on the back burner. But I am SOOOOO close to being my ideal weight that its hard to stop working hard to blast those last 4.5 pounds off! I get so pumped just thinking about finally weighing 145 lbs.

I guess after writing I know what I need to do though. I wanted my second child to be BORN by now, not just to be pregnant. I can afford to take the time out of my workout schedules and plans for a couple weeks to make this chance the best it can possibly be. I can always lose weight, with or without JD home... I can't say the same for getting pregnant.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Weight loss

I actually saw the scale go below 150 lbs last week. Wednesday I saw 149. Thursday and Friday I saw 148! Today the scale said 150.5 lbs, but last Monday it was 152... so even though Mondays seems to be the highest weight of the week I can see a 1.5 lb weight loss has happened since last week. That makes me happy. I want to get to 145 lbs in the next couple weeks. Then I will have another chance to try to get pregnant, since the hubs got home this past Thursday.

If I end up pregnant I will at least be at a weight that has eluded me for years now. I started out at 183 lbs when my daughter was born (October 2007), and by November 2008 I was 172 lbs and ready to get things moving after maintaing that weight for 6 months. I never thought I would see the number 145 on my scale again (what I weighed when I got married over 7 years ago). I was going to be happy with 154, but the next 4 lbs came off pretty easily, and that motivated me to go for 5 more. I am doing two workouts a day to help blast that last 5 off. And so far so good. The even better news is that my husband made a bet with a co-worker that he could lose more weight by the end of January and they are now competing. Guys are funny, they compete... women get "diet buddies" or "workout buddies" and encourage. Oh well, what ever works and motivates you. Today was my husband's first day of working out again and I took his measurements and did his weigh in. He has 56 lbs to lose, but men lose weight faster than women, so he should do pretty well if he just starts to move.

If I don't get pregnant I may shoot for 140 lbs next, being 5'-6.5" tall that isn't too much. I have been 135 before and was pretty smokin' hot and had the flattest stomach! That was in college. In High School I weighed 125, but had no bodily fat on me, was on the swim team, water polo team, and that wasn't my best look. I had a flat chest and my hip bones stuck way out, boys made fun of me. But I was naturally thin until I hit college, all of a sudden the boys were hitting on me and asking me out and I was all confused about it. Then one day a guy, who was amazingly cute and all the girls were swooning over, was giving me attention and I was like "What is the deal?" and he said, "You are a woman now" and he motioned in the air an hourglass figure. Hahaha... I was so flattered, and shocked. But he was right, I got my boobs (a day I had looked forward to all my adolescent life) and I had gained some womanly fat over my bony hips and got a little junk in my trunk... LOL Men like that, not the bony look. Well... most men like that. So I was able to embrace my curvy-ness and now I don't really want to be below 140 unless my tummy is still flabby at that weight and then I will keep doing my abs and cardio until I see that happen. At least its a goal to work to attain while I wait to get pregnant again.

If this isn't my month to get pregnant our next chance, when JD is home again and I am ovulating, will not be until early February. So, I will have a chance to work on that final 140 lb goal. But I would be more than happy to be 145 or 148 pounds and pregnant! Don't get me wrong. I know being fit and having strong abs will only help me during my pregnancy, so that is why I keep working on that goal, even though I may end up with a baby in my belly soon. I am excited I will finally be able to be fit AND pregnant. When I got pregnant with KD I wasn't fit, I was 160 lbs and was working full-time and going to school full-time, so I had no time to spend on working out. I love being able to excercise again! Its something that I intend to keep up during my pregnancy so I won't have to work this hard again to lose the weight after the second baby and then I plan to maintain my figure the rest of my life. Hopefully JD will get back to his previous sexier weight. I mean, I still think he is cute, but I miss the "hot" man I met 11 years ago. And it would help him as a father to be able to keep up with his kids as they get older and more active too.

Thursday, November 12, 2009


My husband was due to be home Friday evening, he sent me his flight itinerary and everything. I had to go to Bible Study at church tonight and my husband told me I may not be able to get ahold of him by phone, he said his phone was dropping signal or something like that, and he would call me after I got home from Bible Study Thursday night. I was like... sure, okay, not a big deal.

I went to Bible Study, brought KD and put her in the room with the other kids and the babysitter, everyone asked about JD and when he was coming home, then... just as we got started into our study, all of a sudden there is my husband, in his pilot's uniform, standing in the open doorway! My heart lept out of my chest and I couldn't believe my eyes! I got up and went over to him to give him a hug and a kiss. My face, I am sure, was bright pink and I felt like I was having a hot flash! One of the ladies in the room was like, awwwwe... and had teary eyes. And JD said he got picked up by his Dad and was dropped off at the church and that he had tricked me. I looked at him all shocked and gave him a mock punch in the arm and said, "You jerk!" But I was smiling, and I told everyone that I actually love surprises (I mean LOOOOOOVE surprises). But it is JD's birthday tomorrow, I should be the one surprising him! haha

Needless to say, it was a bit difficult to get back on track and into the study. But I was able to in the end. And then after the study was over we went to the room to pick up KD and I was running in front of JD to get there first so I could see her reaction to him. When she saw me she smiled and stood up from her playing, then she saw her Daddy walk in and she stood there, as if in shock. Her face was priceless. Then she sat down and started playing with another toy... LOL Kids, who knows what that was about. She acted very nonchalant about the whole thing. But I am sure she felt mainly shock and disbelief.

When we got home KD had a few snacks before bed and got to sit on her Daddy's lap and talk to him and show him just how more verbal she has gotten since he left, almost seven weeks ago. Luckily it was time for her to go to bed soon, he was tired and we both were... ahem, "missing" each other. (Blush) By the time JD fell asleep it was two hours before my bedtime, so I was watching TV in bed while he slept... and then the snoring started. Nice. Ah, the joys of having your husband home again. Lucky for me I had bought a new batch of ear plugs today when at Wal-Mart, so I am prepared. And right now I am watching my recorded shows and blogging in the living room. Everything is back to normal :-)

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

The excercise continues

I weighed in on Monday and lost maybe... at most... 1/2 a lb. Sunday showed no change on the scale but Monday morning it showed a 1/2 lb difference compared to the previous week. So, we will see what happens next week. But the exciting thing is when I measured my belly area (where I want to lose the extra flab) I lost 1 1/2" from that area! So that is fabulous!! I really am trying to keep my focus on the inches, even though I would love to finally break the 150 lb barrier, which is what I supposedly weigh at the moment... or maybe 150.5 lbs.

So the excercise continues! I did weights with some cardio involved 5 days a week and cardio with some weights involved 5 days a week (for my 2 workouts a day). Since my muscles were constantly sore every day last week and Monday were practically crying at me for all the abuse (and therefore I didn't do the weights that day, just the cardio) I have decided to just keep up the weights 3 workouts per week and the 7 other workouts focus on cardio. This should be a successful plan. I don't want to lose the muscle tone I already have, but I want to blast off the last layer of fat on my tummy. And we all know (or should) that the only way to get rid of that is not doing a bunch of crunches and lifting weights, but by doing your cardio and eating a low fat/ low calorie/ healthy diet. BUT I also know that the muscle is important in maintaining my metabolism, muscle burns more fat! So its a balancing act.

My husband should be home soon, this Friday. So that makes me happy. I can't wait to see him again! By the time he is home it will almost be 7 full weeks since he left. I am use to 35 days of him being gone. So its been rough for me. And KD has been hurting herself in random ways lately too. The other day she walked right into the corner of a bar ledge at her grandparent's house, and then while she was throwing tantrums throughout the house the other day (after being told "no" a couple times) she got some sort of rug burn on her forehead (hahah... have to laugh, its just ridiculous), and then today to top it off she fell off a chair as she lurched forward to get off and smacked her face on the cement and cut her lip open on her teeth... so she has a black eye from the ledge, a red mark from her tantrums, and a fat lip from the fall today. Such a pretty picture. And I did take a picture to show her Daddy just how crazy big that fat lip was today! She handles all the bumps like a pro. She shakes it off pretty easily. But she does also milk it for sympathy and wants to be cuddled and pampered. But that is okay with me, she isn't that cuddly that often since she became a busy toddler. :-) I just want her to stop injuring herself... at least until her Daddy comes home, then he can deal with it. Hahah

Thursday, November 5, 2009

Happy things

I like it when so many things go well in life. So much of the time we hear the bad news and never enough good news! So here is all my good news :)

My husband is finally coming home! Yay!! He arrives home on his birthday, November 13th! Happy birthday, I arranged that especially for you, Hun. Ok, well... maybe not. But that is a great birthday present! He got signed off to the line early, he needed 6 more training hours in the plane and his fleet manager signed him off because it seems like he had been "flying the falcon for years" ...impressive! So I guess my husband is a good pilot after all. Haha... I knew that already. He says enough things that I can tell. And I have flown with him before, he is very professional and knowledgeable. And this means he will be home for Thanksgiving this year. He leaves again December 14th for his rotation, but I will take what I can get :-)

One very good thing about JD coming home is that we have another chance to try for that baby #2 we have been wanting. I am wondering if this is our time? I have short cycles, but every 6 months or so I have a normal length one. I wonder if when its a normal 28 day cycle (which it should be during the time he is home) that I am more fertile? Perhaps the lining isn't thick enough for that egg to stick to and that's why I have my period 4 to 5 days early every month? Someone mentioned her sister had short periods and that is what the Dr. was thinking for her situation. So, I don't know for sure if that is happening with me, but this will be interesting. Of course, I don't know if my cycle will be 28 days this time... but looking at past history I am due for that regular cycle very soon.

My Aunt Pattie, who has been in the hospital since April this year, is now at a rehab facility and is off all tubes and the trachea things are gone out of her neck! Yay!! So happy she has been doing so well and turning that corner like she is in the Indie 500... haha. She may even be home to celebrate Thanksgiving with us! Double Yay!!! I don't know if that will actually happen, but it means a lot for someone to say its possible. I am sure if she comes home she will still need to go to physical therapy, but I know she wants to come home, and we all want her home too.

I also am planning on having lunch with a couple fellow bloggers who actually follow my blog! So cool! I am so stoked about that!! They are also pilot wives and its fun to meet other PWs who know where you are coming from on certain areas that others just have no clue about. And my hubby will be home to watch the munchkin, so I don't have to worry about her coming with me and getting antsy at the restaurant and not being able to pay attention to everyone and have a good chat. Yay!!

This month I also decided to pick up the pace and try to lose 5 more pounds and make my belly flab go away for good! After the months and months of crunches and other ab work my abs are hard as a rock! I can see some definition occurring on the sides of my abs and there is just this little pudgy area around my belly button (from being pregnant with KD) that is being super stubborn. I want to see all my hard work under there :-) So, I have committed myself to doing two 30 to 45 min workouts a day, five days a week. This week is my first week and I have done 3 out of 5 days so far. Plus I am watching what I eat, of course... counting those calories (so annoying, but necessary). Also, I am happy to say I weigh less today than I have in YEARS! I don't even remember the last time I was this close to being under the 150 lbs mark. I am guessing it was in 2004 or 2005. I weigh 150.5 lbs right now and am SO close to getting under that this week. I am so excited, I can't even tell you! Just... so excited!!

Life is good :-) Hope you find your "happy things" list today too!