Who knew excercising actually DOES make you feel better! And all this time I thought it was probably true, but never actually tried excercising when I was feeling down. But after going to the gym with a girlfriend of mine I felt extremely and downright happy! Cool! So, I guess I have a reason to keep going on a regular basis.
It helps to have a friend that is commited to working out like I am, as well. If she wasn't depending on me to meet her there at the gym then I could have easily come up with an excuse not to go at all the past few times. And we are also keeping an eye on each other's eating habits too, for accountability. Sounds scary, but it helps to know someone can see what you are eating at any time (we use an on-line calorie counting site).
Since the husband was gone this month and my family support down the street (the in-laws) were gone too, for about three weeks, I was feeling a bit more depressed than I was comfortable with. I am so glad that just working out for 30 minutes actually energized me and made me happy again! I didn't like the idea of seeking out professional help to get me to sleep at night and relieve my depression. I would rather not take medication if I can help it at all. (Not that it is bad to have to take medication, totally believe that some of my own family members are better off with it than without it. I just didn't want to go that route if there was an alternative.) Of course JD is happy about it too, he was getting concerned as well.
That is all I have to report for now...
Bye!
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Sunday, October 12, 2008
Loneliness and Friends
I am thankful that I have friends in those times where I am home alone with my baby and I feel twinges of loneliness or have a case of the blues.
I was at home in bed, it was only six o' clock, and I knew I would need to get myself dinner at some point and get the baby once she woke up from her nap. So I started texting a friend of mine:
"I'm bored and lonely"
"I don't want to cook anything for myself"
"Perhaps I will just go to MacDonald's or something once the baby wakes up."
five minutes later...
"I am having tuna and crackers for dinner... no cooking required :-)"
Then my friend calls me after this series of messages and invites me to dinner with herself and her friend. I got the baby and went and we had a great time. The following day we went to dinner as well and then she and her friend and her friend's husband came over to my house to play some games after the baby went to bed for the night. I am thankful for a good friend like her who comes to my rescue at a moment's notice.
The next night I again was feeling down, so I called another friend of mine and he came over right away and watched TV with me and talked with me about whatever was on my mind. He is someone I am also thankful for, that when I was down he just dropped everything and came over to cheer me up. Plus, he is gay... so my husband doesn't have to worry about me being in the house alone with him ;-) But besides that fact, he is just an all around wonderful friend, and I appreciate him a lot.
I am glad I have such great friends in my life, to come rally around me when my husband is gone flying somewhere and I miss him so much. I am blessed.
I was at home in bed, it was only six o' clock, and I knew I would need to get myself dinner at some point and get the baby once she woke up from her nap. So I started texting a friend of mine:
"I'm bored and lonely"
"I don't want to cook anything for myself"
"Perhaps I will just go to MacDonald's or something once the baby wakes up."
five minutes later...
"I am having tuna and crackers for dinner... no cooking required :-)"
Then my friend calls me after this series of messages and invites me to dinner with herself and her friend. I got the baby and went and we had a great time. The following day we went to dinner as well and then she and her friend and her friend's husband came over to my house to play some games after the baby went to bed for the night. I am thankful for a good friend like her who comes to my rescue at a moment's notice.
The next night I again was feeling down, so I called another friend of mine and he came over right away and watched TV with me and talked with me about whatever was on my mind. He is someone I am also thankful for, that when I was down he just dropped everything and came over to cheer me up. Plus, he is gay... so my husband doesn't have to worry about me being in the house alone with him ;-) But besides that fact, he is just an all around wonderful friend, and I appreciate him a lot.
I am glad I have such great friends in my life, to come rally around me when my husband is gone flying somewhere and I miss him so much. I am blessed.
Wednesday, October 8, 2008
White legs
Well today has been interesting, and its not over yet, its only 1:30pm. My day started when I was woken up at 4am this morning by KD with only getting 2 hours of sleep at that point, I have trouble falling asleep before 2am... an insomnia problem that I have had for a while. Then after we both fell back asleep I was woken up again at 9:30am from a deep sleep by her crying... time to get up. I should have felt at least somewhat rested at that point, but I felt like I hadn't slept at all and could have stayed in bed all day... and perhaps I should have. But I had a lot to do today (still have more to do).
So... after I instant messaged my hubby in a far away country, I fed KD and got ready myself, then proceeded to pack the baby in the car and drive off down my neighborhood street. Half way down the street I realized I forgot my phone, and I decided I better get it just in case something happened while I was out and about and needed to call for help or a tow or some other horrible scenario. I pulled into the driveway over more to the right side than I usually do, and thought to myself, "You need to remember you are over more and to be careful when you back out of the driveway." But after I got my phone, locked the house back up, hopped back into the car and put it in reverse I just backed up with out a glance in my right side mirror. Needless to say, that wasn't a good idea. I ended up running into the corner of our white picket fence. I heard a big "CHRUNCH" and stopped... pulled forward a little... got out of the car to assess the damage, and then saw the right rear tail light lens broken up and all over the ground. Well... at least the bumper and the rest of the car wasn't damaged. "Phew!" But what a dumb thing that was to do. Luckily, I was actually on the way to the car dealership to pick up at part for the car anyways and have it installed. When I got to the dealer they had the tail lens in stock and were able to replace it right away. Now all I have to worry about is the broken fence post.
I instant messaged JD to let him know that I had just cost us some unnecessary expense. He wasn't mad, but I felt like an air headed buffoon at this point. Then the day just kept getting better and better (insert sarcastic tone). I hadn't eaten lunch yet and decided to go across the street from the car dealer to Quiznos (a sandwich place). As I was I.M.-ing JD about the car and waiting for the cross walk to tell me to "walk" I realized I had the key to the car in my pocket. So I walked back over to the dealership and put the key back in the car, went back over to the cross walk and proceeded to Quiznos. When I got to the door of Quiznos it said they were closed and the place was empty inside... like they had moved out completely! I was so jittery and hungry at this point that I was starting to feel like the day just wasn't meant to go my way.
I then spotted a Togo's kitty corner from where I was (another sandwich place) so I proceeded to cross the street to go there. As I was crossing the street... again... a guy in a truck leaned out his window and said, "Get a tan, why don't you!" (or something to that effect) and I just smirked at him and shook my head and under my breath said, "whatever... jerk." I know, not very nice on my part either... but I was already having a bad day and this guy was being an idiot (so forgive me). And I was pushing my baby in a stroller across the street... like who cares if I have white legs? Who makes a comment like that to a mother pushing her baby in a cross walk? Just save your breath or keep it to yourself. I mean really, was that necessary?
You see, I live in Southern California... so apparently its a crime against humanity to have white legs here. Its so ridiculous. I call it white prejudism.. or reverse prejudice. I am sick of my easily tanned and Hispanic friends looking at my legs and saying, "why are your legs so white?", and strangers thinking that I am a freak for daring to even think of wearing shorts with white legs. I mean... God forbid I do such a horrendous thing! Its just a fact of life, my legs have never tanned. They hardly even pick up a sunburn. I'm WHITE people... get a clue! I don't have any dark skinned genes in my family (wish I did, it would be nice to look tan all year round). And skin cancer runs in my family, so I am not about to attempt to lay in the sun for hours and get a tan anyways. And, yes, I have tried the spray on tan stuff, but it wears off in a few days and I am not trying to impress anybody. I just stay at home with the baby all day, I am sure she could care less what color her Mommy's legs are. And my husband doesn't care... he is just as white as I am, plus he hates the smell of that spray tan stuff when I use it. And he thinks I am beautiful the way I am. I have accepted the fact that I will never be a brown goddess, tanned, ideal California girl. And I can give my naturally tan friends a hard time and joke about their being "prejudice" (ha ha)... but when a stranger yells it out a window at me... that is just mean. Okay... I am over it now. Thanks for letting me vent.
But that's not all! When I got to Togo's I dropped my cup twice, the baby started getting restless and crying... so I scarfed down the second half of my sandwich and left as soon as I could. And did I mention, it was so bloomin' hot outside! I had pit marks from my sweat (not a pretty picture) and I am sure my face was beet red (as it always gets when I am hot). When I got back to the dealership waiting room KD decided to throw a mini tantrum when I didn't let her walk into an area I didn't think she should go. And then later when I got my car I dropped my keys on the ground, I mean total butter fingers all day. I was happy to run home and just not do anything... accept write this blog while KD takes a nap. Maybe I need a nap too, so I can wake up again and start over. After all... I do have to head out again for more errands today, and I don't want to get into any more accidents. My experience at the dealership wasn't exactly something I wish to repeat either. Oh well, that is just how life is sometimes. I guess I just should laugh at it all and take a deep breath. But writing about it and complaining just a tad helps too ;-)
So... after I instant messaged my hubby in a far away country, I fed KD and got ready myself, then proceeded to pack the baby in the car and drive off down my neighborhood street. Half way down the street I realized I forgot my phone, and I decided I better get it just in case something happened while I was out and about and needed to call for help or a tow or some other horrible scenario. I pulled into the driveway over more to the right side than I usually do, and thought to myself, "You need to remember you are over more and to be careful when you back out of the driveway." But after I got my phone, locked the house back up, hopped back into the car and put it in reverse I just backed up with out a glance in my right side mirror. Needless to say, that wasn't a good idea. I ended up running into the corner of our white picket fence. I heard a big "CHRUNCH" and stopped... pulled forward a little... got out of the car to assess the damage, and then saw the right rear tail light lens broken up and all over the ground. Well... at least the bumper and the rest of the car wasn't damaged. "Phew!" But what a dumb thing that was to do. Luckily, I was actually on the way to the car dealership to pick up at part for the car anyways and have it installed. When I got to the dealer they had the tail lens in stock and were able to replace it right away. Now all I have to worry about is the broken fence post.
I instant messaged JD to let him know that I had just cost us some unnecessary expense. He wasn't mad, but I felt like an air headed buffoon at this point. Then the day just kept getting better and better (insert sarcastic tone). I hadn't eaten lunch yet and decided to go across the street from the car dealer to Quiznos (a sandwich place). As I was I.M.-ing JD about the car and waiting for the cross walk to tell me to "walk" I realized I had the key to the car in my pocket. So I walked back over to the dealership and put the key back in the car, went back over to the cross walk and proceeded to Quiznos. When I got to the door of Quiznos it said they were closed and the place was empty inside... like they had moved out completely! I was so jittery and hungry at this point that I was starting to feel like the day just wasn't meant to go my way.
I then spotted a Togo's kitty corner from where I was (another sandwich place) so I proceeded to cross the street to go there. As I was crossing the street... again... a guy in a truck leaned out his window and said, "Get a tan, why don't you!" (or something to that effect) and I just smirked at him and shook my head and under my breath said, "whatever... jerk." I know, not very nice on my part either... but I was already having a bad day and this guy was being an idiot (so forgive me). And I was pushing my baby in a stroller across the street... like who cares if I have white legs? Who makes a comment like that to a mother pushing her baby in a cross walk? Just save your breath or keep it to yourself. I mean really, was that necessary?
You see, I live in Southern California... so apparently its a crime against humanity to have white legs here. Its so ridiculous. I call it white prejudism.. or reverse prejudice. I am sick of my easily tanned and Hispanic friends looking at my legs and saying, "why are your legs so white?", and strangers thinking that I am a freak for daring to even think of wearing shorts with white legs. I mean... God forbid I do such a horrendous thing! Its just a fact of life, my legs have never tanned. They hardly even pick up a sunburn. I'm WHITE people... get a clue! I don't have any dark skinned genes in my family (wish I did, it would be nice to look tan all year round). And skin cancer runs in my family, so I am not about to attempt to lay in the sun for hours and get a tan anyways. And, yes, I have tried the spray on tan stuff, but it wears off in a few days and I am not trying to impress anybody. I just stay at home with the baby all day, I am sure she could care less what color her Mommy's legs are. And my husband doesn't care... he is just as white as I am, plus he hates the smell of that spray tan stuff when I use it. And he thinks I am beautiful the way I am. I have accepted the fact that I will never be a brown goddess, tanned, ideal California girl. And I can give my naturally tan friends a hard time and joke about their being "prejudice" (ha ha)... but when a stranger yells it out a window at me... that is just mean. Okay... I am over it now. Thanks for letting me vent.
But that's not all! When I got to Togo's I dropped my cup twice, the baby started getting restless and crying... so I scarfed down the second half of my sandwich and left as soon as I could. And did I mention, it was so bloomin' hot outside! I had pit marks from my sweat (not a pretty picture) and I am sure my face was beet red (as it always gets when I am hot). When I got back to the dealership waiting room KD decided to throw a mini tantrum when I didn't let her walk into an area I didn't think she should go. And then later when I got my car I dropped my keys on the ground, I mean total butter fingers all day. I was happy to run home and just not do anything... accept write this blog while KD takes a nap. Maybe I need a nap too, so I can wake up again and start over. After all... I do have to head out again for more errands today, and I don't want to get into any more accidents. My experience at the dealership wasn't exactly something I wish to repeat either. Oh well, that is just how life is sometimes. I guess I just should laugh at it all and take a deep breath. But writing about it and complaining just a tad helps too ;-)
Sunday, October 5, 2008
Cat check!
So I was having a great time, laughing and playing games with my gal pals at the cabin, when I got a phone call from my Dad. Thankfully I got cell phone reception while up there in the mountains. My Grandmother wasn't doing well and he suggested I call her after we hung up. I did, and I am glad I did because two days later I got a call from him again that she had passed away. She was 94, so she had lived a long life. But its a bitter sweet thing when someone you love dies, even if they are elderly and in pain. I would have rather she died in her sleep one day, painlessly, when she was 100 years old or something. But that wasn't God's plan. I am glad I got to tell her one last time, "I love you" and that through the drugged up fog (from pain killers) she got the message and said, "I love you too."
Another reason to be happy is that for her 94th birthday I was able to take my new baby girl on a road trip with my husband to visit her (that is a photo from our visit). I had also thought to take video of her interacting with KD for my baby to be able to see what her Great Grandmother was like when they met. My Grandma was a funny lady. I always laughed when she sent me e-mails, such a great sense of humor. I remember after her second hip replacement surgery she announced that she was now a "hip-py" and then put on an orange wig and sent a picture out to everyone that showed her wearing it and holding up a peace sign and a big grin. It was so silly you just had to laugh. She also was always positive, no matter what. Such a great quality that I wish I possessed. She always had a smile on her face, had nice things to say about the worst people, and told the best anecdotes.
Here are a couple of her silly stories from some e-mails I saved from her: BTW... she always typed in all caps so she could read what she was writing. I have kept the font size and the typing as she wrote it.
Another reason to be happy is that for her 94th birthday I was able to take my new baby girl on a road trip with my husband to visit her (that is a photo from our visit). I had also thought to take video of her interacting with KD for my baby to be able to see what her Great Grandmother was like when they met. My Grandma was a funny lady. I always laughed when she sent me e-mails, such a great sense of humor. I remember after her second hip replacement surgery she announced that she was now a "hip-py" and then put on an orange wig and sent a picture out to everyone that showed her wearing it and holding up a peace sign and a big grin. It was so silly you just had to laugh. She also was always positive, no matter what. Such a great quality that I wish I possessed. She always had a smile on her face, had nice things to say about the worst people, and told the best anecdotes.
Here are a couple of her silly stories from some e-mails I saved from her: BTW... she always typed in all caps so she could read what she was writing. I have kept the font size and the typing as she wrote it.
She shared this story after I told her JD & I got a rabbit for a pet: "WHEN YOUR UNCLE WAS ABOUT 3 AND YOUR DAD WAS 2, WE DECIDED WE WOULD GET SOME RABBITS. WE GOT JOE, JOSEPHINE AND FANCY PANTS AND MADE LARGE HUTCHES FOR THEM. WE DIDN'T KNOW THAT JOSEPHINE HAD GOTTEN OUT FOR A NIGHT OF ROMANCE BEFORE WE GOT HER. NOT MANY DAYS AFTER THEY WERE SETTLED IN WE HAD 16 RABBITS !!! I THINK WE STARTED OUT WITH THE INTENTION OF ADDING THEM TO OUR MENU; BUT NONE OF US COULD STAND THE THOUGHT OF IT AND WE SOLD THEM. HAD TO TAKE DOWN A SECTION OF FENCE TO GET THEM OUT TO THEIR NEW OWNER"She Shared this story after I told her JD dropped the bunny in the toilet accidentally: "ONE DAY I WAS IN MY BIG TUB AND THE WATER WAS PRETTY HOT WHEN ONE OF THE CATS DECIDED HE WANTED TO GET IN THE TUB- A FAVORITE PLACE TO GET A DRINK. I HAD TO KEEP PUSHING HIM OFF THE RIM OF THE TUB TO KEEP HIM OUT OF THE HOT WATER. NOW WE DO A CAT CHECK ON BATH DAY."
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